Tag: Funny Things

Almost 60,000 people in the country get anesthesia-induced surgeries every day. You’ve undoubtedly witnessed the amusing result of it when patients say the most embarrassing things without realising what they said afterwards.

What if you took advantage of that occurrence and, just before the anaesthesia kicked in, you said something clever to make your surgeon laugh aloud? This identical subject was posed on Reddit, and some of the greatest answers were provided. Consider using them the next time you go under.

#1

“I think I’m going to be sick,” said the nurse helping me with my vasectomy, and she quickly left the room. I responded, “That’s not the usual reaction I get when I drop my trousers,” to my doctor.

He needed ten minutes to gather his thoughts.

#2

In the moments preceding my colonoscopy, I asked the doctor, “Are you sure this is right? I recently visited for a dental cleaning.” “Don’t worry, we can get there from here.” was his quick response.

#3

When I was a teenager, I was under for a very minor foot operation. I’m already hooked up to an IV and lying on bed in the prep room. The anesthesiologist enters, takes a seat directly next the bed, leans in to speak with me about what to expect from the anaesthesia, and puts his elbows on his knees.

Suddenly, I’m all woozy. He’s holding my IV tube and using a syringe to administer medication into the port when I glanced over the edge of the bed. He simply went and finished it in midsentence. He didn’t even seem to take his eyes off of me.

My mother claims that after turning to face him, I said, “Ooohh, so you’re a sneaky bastard,” and left right away.

Since we’re discussing amusing things to say before to being drugged, you should be aware that patients can also say incredibly humorous things while they’re unconscious. Known as America’s Holistic Plastic Surgeon, Dr. Anthony Youn was interviewed by Bored Panda to hear about some of his experiences treating these kinds of patients. He disclosed: “On rare occasions, this occurs. After surgery, one of my patients came up somewhat disoriented and asked, “How does Dr. Youn have so much hair when he’s so old?” Who’s calling who elderly now that she’s in her 60s?

“I had another patient say, ‘I didn’t stain my trousers, did I?” he continued. She was concerned that during the procedure, she would pass gas! I’ve seen a lot of patients cry when they wake up, but they never know why! Simply blubbering with tears!

#4

While I was away, I asked my surgical team if anyone needed anything.

#5

Anesthesiologist: “All right, time to turn in for the night.”

Me: “I believe at least ONE of us ought to remain awake.” And I left.

#6

I’ve saw a patient perform a respectable one.
“Are you ready for a joke? “What is the best way to keep an anaesthetist guessing?”

Most patients who undergo anaesthesia are aware that it will cause them to feel disoriented. What does that really mean, though? The sedatives that are used have an impact on specific regions of the brain and the chemicals that reside there, which might change your behaviour and state of consciousness. For instance, some neurotransmitters that produce anxiety can be blocked by breathing in nitrous oxide, also known as laughing gas. Additionally, it triggers the brain chemical norepinephrine to be released, which helps lessen pain and discomfort.

Generally speaking, anaesthesia can ease your discomfort and worry while promoting relaxation throughout the surgical procedure. Because some sedatives may potentially have lingering effects, patients are advised to have a companion or not use heavy machinery following the procedure. It also clarifies the abundance of films showing individuals behaving abnormally following surgery.

#7

The night before Thanksgiving, three guys attacked me viciously with baseball bats as I was making my way to the tube. As I was being hurried into the operating room, I noticed that you were wearing transfusion wristbands. “Do these things come in turkey and gravy flavour?” I asked the nurses and doctors as I looked up and noticed the bags and the nurse hurried me into the operating room. I fell into a three-day coma right away. My final words before passing out were a Thanksgiving joke, haha.

#8

I’m a middle-aged man with a belly. I replied, “If it’s a choice between me and the baby… choose me.” .

#9

While I was in the hospital, a colonoscopy was being performed to try and diagnose the issue. “Aren’t you supposed to buy me dinner first?” I asked the doctor just before the anaesthesia took effect. He was there with my breakfast when I woke up.

Because general anaesthesia allows patients to remain relatively pain-free during surgery, it has revolutionised the surgical field. But that’s only because sedatives of the past are a thing of the past. The finest ‘pain-killer’ remedies available to humans before the invention of modern medications were sucking down on a stick or drinking a shot of whisky.

An individual by the name of Crawford Long gave the drug ether to a man having surgery for a tumour in 1842. He discovered that it assisted in reducing the patient’s agony, and he subsequently made his findings available to the public. It’s amusing to consider that the bright minds behind anaesthesia may have indirectly influenced the development of a humorous video genre.

#10

After giving me the shock treatment for my abnormal heartbeat, my doctor asked me a ridiculous and out of the ordinary question. I muttered something like, “That sounds like a stupid question to distract me until the meds knock me out,” but I didn’t answer the question. The medical professionals in the room burst out laughing. Subsequently, I discovered that he asks the same question each time, and before I was brought into the room, one of them had just asked him why. He stated that the question was well-crafted, forcing individuals to reflect, which diverts their attention until the medication takes action.

#11

I questioned the surgical assistant whether he had heard that diarrhoea is inherited because it runs in your family. Geekishly, he asked if he could keep me awake long enough for me to tell the operating room surgeons about it, which I did. When I counted down, I seem to have heard them laughing.

#12

As the anesthesiologist was putting me to sleep, I did say to him, “Mr. Wonka! It’s incredible! I can already feel the tomato soup pouring down my neck! passed out as everyone in the operation room was laughing uncontrollably.

Our interviewee, surgeon Dr. Anthony Youn, also shared a comical experience he had with a patient while performing surgery. “They are usually pretty with it before surgery,” he stated. They may become slightly deranged, but that’s all. When my patient was under the influence, I asked them who killed Biggie and Tupac, and they told me! My patient was once in the inner circle with one of the rappers in the whole Tupac/Biggie movement.

#13

Evidently “don’t worry I’m not embarrassed cause I’m a [adult movie] star”

Although I don’t remember saying it, it seems like I did just before I passed out from my testicular torsion surgery.

When the doctor made rounds the following morning, I was welcomed with “good morning [adult movie] star!”

#14

I asked, “How can you tell when I’m…?” when they instructed me to begin counting down from 100. This was no joke. I don’t recall how I came up with the phrase unconscious, but that’s what I intended to communicate.

I asked, “How can you tell when I’m…?” when they instructed me to begin counting down from 100. This was no joke. I don’t recall how I came up with the phrase unconscious, but that’s what I intended to communicate.

#15

Anesthesiologists typically find that smokers require more anaesthesia while taking sedatives. Women who smoke during surgery need 33% more anaesthesia than women who do not smoke, according to a research. Their requirement for increasing doses of pain medicine to increase their tolerance to the breathing tubes is a result of their inflamed airways.

Anaesthesia also has the drawback of having a delayed onset, with some persons even exhibiting the amusing side effects. Following surgery, some people get sick and throw up. Fortunately, however, studies have shown that inhaling the aroma of either lavender or ginger essential oil for five minutes will reduce the intensity of those sensations. The effects of this are transient and frequently fade off after a few hours at most, even if that doesn’t work.

#16

You’re mine, according to my mother, who stated she dated you in college.

#17

I’ve had a room full of people inside of me before, not this time.

#18

As soon as the drowsy medications were given for my colonoscopy, I wondered, “How long will this take?” “It depends on how well you followed the prep schedule,” they added, referring to the day-before liquid diet and laxatives used to clear the pipes.

Just before the lights went out, I turned to face them and exclaimed, “What prep?!” with a truly bewildered expression.

Although it’s not a good idea to play about with anaesthesia, you can make the experience much more enjoyable if you have to go under during a surgical procedure by attempting some of these intriguing tips. You might even brighten your surgeon’s day! Are you prepared to tell your doctor something amusing before the sedatives take effect? Tell us in the comments below.

#19

Just before my bowel was to be removed, I informed the surgeon that he could take as much as he needed to create ONE bratwurst. In order to make it slightly simpler for him to cut through, I also told him that I had purposefully let my six-pack abs to atrophy.

#20

The anesthesiologist sang Billie Jean to me immediately before I passed out last year when I was given propofol for anaesthesia. We were laughing about Michael Jackson at the time.

#21

“A*****e over yonder is going to stick a dremel up my nose and evict both Phillis and a chunk of over growing carteliedge, but he’s under strict instructions to not breach the brain barrier unless he can gaurantee he only removes the depressed braincells,” I said, gesturing over my shoulder at the ENT surgeon when the nurse asked me what operation I was having (a common last-minute check question).

To put things in perspective, my wife attended medical school and became an ENT surgeon while I underwent sinus surgery, including a small FES and pollop ectomy.

The poor nurse was so agitated and frightened by my response that it seemed as though I had gone out like a light and they were unable to begin operating for ten minutes because Mat, the ENT, could not stop laughing. Said the ENT almost burst out laughing.

#22

I asked the attending nurse to prom just before I went to Mario Land to go off the pain medication after breaking my ankle. That was when I was 35.

#23

The nurse who wheeled me in for my colonoscopy and I had a fascinating conversation, though not quite the same. “Don’t stress, Michael Jackson had this stuff for breakfast,” he stated, as I was about to be put under anesthesia. I was scared.

Me: “Well, that’s probably why Michael Jackson passed away.”

#24

I have a standard colonoscopy scheduled for soon. To count backwards from twenty, they instructed me. I remained awake for a few seconds after that. I said, “Don’t touch my butt until I’m asleep or I’ll be embarrassed,” glancing at the surgeon. They laughed, and that’s all I remember before my husband helped me get dressed to go and I woke up in recovery.

#25

I always tell the anesthesiologist that I’m not a cheap date because I’m a redhead. This came after someone claimed to have almost completely depleted his medication bag in order to keep me unconscious for the procedure. When I woke up, I was still intubated and attempted to remove the tube on my own.

#26

Can you look into that for me? I swallowed a lot of gum when I was younger.

#27

Please just make sure I look like Chris Hemsworth when I wake up.

#28

Years ago, my doctor urged me to play pranks on his friend who is an anesthesiologist before I walked into the surgery room. He asked me to say, “Oh no, not you again,” since I was game. I did, and the priceless expression on his face led to the room’s laughs.

#29

Before he performed a spinal cord stimulator implant on me, I asked the surgeon if the operating room had WiFi. He questioned why I was asking that, his expression bewildered. In case you need to seek up anything regarding the operation, I said. “Don’t worry about that, I helped develop the procedure,” was his response.

#30

I said to the nurse that the room and the wall clock reminded me of a SAW movie, which made her giggle.

#31

When I first passed out, I asked the doctor if I was meant to count backwards from 100 like I used to see on TV.

He stated that “it doesn’t matter you’ll be out before you get to 75”

“100 99 98 97 96…..”
“Sir! Sir!It’s time to get dressed, so wake up.”

I found it humorous after, though I’m not sure whether he did.

#32

And tonight’s lottery numbers are 25, 36.

#33

I can’t wait to contain you inside of me.